I made steak for dinner tonight. This was my first time ever cooking a steak. I had no clue what i was doing but i have heard of people pan searing them and then broiling them... i don't know if you are suppose to do one or the other.... I pan seared it for about 5 min... seasoned in with just fresh ground pepper and sea salt and then threw it into the oven for about 7 minutes. I am really pleased how it turned out. Next time I will marinate it for a few hours. I used a boneless t-bone steak. I am sure it was the wrong type of steak and I did everything wrong but it was very juicy and pretty tender... so I can't complain. Got some tomatoes from the garden while it was cooking and that was dinner! It is fun to try something completely new.

Over the last Year...

I have been reflecting on where I was a year ago and where I am now. I think that I have made some good progress towards living a happier more fulfilling life. I am NOT the person that I was a year ago! Yay! Progress is always good. I definitely have developed more socially. I find that it is much easier to talk to people. To some people I might not seem that I have some serious social problems but I do. I think I genuinely hate talking to people some days. Over the last year I have seen 2 jobs go sour... consistently made one good friend and met alot of people at each job, seen a friendship go from fantastic to terrible and back to good and to an acquaintance now, been fired from a job for the first time, quit and start world of warcraft about 3 times, moved, survived my 21st, and some other randomness in between. I guess i am doing alright.

This is a photo I took yesterday (Monday) morning.

working on life

Well I have been working on life today. It all started with a sleeping pill last night and a good 9.5 hours of sleep. I woke up a bit groggy but that wore off with a shot of espresso. Went to work still a little sleepy but after about 15 minutes found myself very motivated and alert. It was great thing went pretty well today. It's been about a week since I had gotten a good nights rest. I don't know what is up but I think changing my diet, habits, and getting a bit more exercise should do the trick. Much easier said then done. Well I got home and was out the door again before 5 minutes had past. I rode to Ross Dress for Less and finally bought some clothes for myself. See I am still wearing many of my shirts and shorts from middle-high school. Time for some new clothes, yah? Well I got some socks, 2 pair of pants, and 2 t-shirts. I am a guy so I shouldn't enjoy shopping right? Well if you ever find yourself wearing many clothes with holes in them I think that you would too. I am going to burd all my old clothes! maybe not... still good for work clothes... and very confortable.
So i went to freddies and got some stuff to make pasta with. Got home threw it all together and this is what came out:

It was really fun to cook for myself again.
I have really been puting out the effor lately to re-conect with people that I have let go. So far so good. Woah, screaming outside...... i must inverstigate...


Wierd... there was a car with about 5 kids in it with the stereo up all the way.... they stopped got out of the car and danced and sang to the music in the middle of the street. I think they were either very drunk or high. They stayed for about 10 mintues.... then drove off. Rich kids.

Well that is enough tomfoolery for now.

How do you live life to the fullest?

I have realized that I don't often live life to the fullest and that I often let connections with people fade and wonder why i feel so lonely sometimes. American culture does not help people meet each other. It sux. So I am making an effort to re-connect with people..... tonight i spent about 4 hours talking to people that I have not talked to in a long time. Many of them and I are much different then we used to be but will still have a part of our life in common. I want to connect to more people. I guess since I am not going to school that is hard..... I have my job and that is about it. There is one girl there, Rebecca that I feel some connection with. She is nice and we seem to have some kind of a connection. It is really hard for me to tell if is anything then a work friendship.. but not like it matters because she is moving back to Corvallis to go back to school at OSU. Why are most people so reserved? What is so dangerous about going out and meeting people? I am speaking for myself too. I guess I just want to do my best to purse life to the best of my ability. Do what I want and pursue as may interests as I can at once. So what do you do?

update

Well things are going ok. I still have a job so that is a plus. I have to work tomorrow at 9 pm... a big 4 thousand dollar catering order... I am going to be at a wedding serving food. I will have put in about 46 hours this week... so that is good. I will try my best to search my brain and remember all the stuff I think about to tell you 2-3 people who read.