Something dawned on me today......I should get a second job. I am working alot now but when the owners return from Hawaii it will be back to my normal 30 hour weeks. I am not going to school.... so screw that! This is a decent chance for me to save money for whenever I magically find out what I want to do. A year ago I quit my job at the ladybug and want probably working both at this time. I was going into my job at Sweet Masterpiece in the Pearl District. I was so full of hope and purpose. I knew what I wanted to do and I was activly pursuing it. I felt on top of the world but the more I tryed I seemed to slip further down. At the end of my employment there, I felt hopelessly lost and fearful of the future. I thought that I had given it my all and ended up somehow getting fired! WTF???!!!
Well I know I do not want to cook for the rest of my life. It is a bad industry frankly... well unless you are at the top but I do not have the potential to be there. You work very hard and get paid very little. Forget that! It is something I can always fall back on in the future.
When I got my job at the Hawaiian place I was happy working little so I had lots of time to play WoW. Now I don't care about computer games as much but still every time I quit wow... I find myself empty. Kinda pathetic. Anywho........ I think if I was to take classes or work a 2nd job I would have very little free time and would not have to play WoW. I just completely waste all the time that I am not at work. When I am there I work hard and enjoy some of it. I quite frankly hate my free time. If I am not makeing music then I feel like I am wasting it. I just have been feeling like a total looser lately. I don't feel any purpose in my life. I get out of work and then I wait to go to work again.... so I might as well never leave...... j/k.... I need some time off. Maybe I can find something that is not in the restaurant industry. Well...... time for bed..... 2:15 am.
Frustrating.......
But in a way I do enjoy the challenge of changing. I know I can do it.
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